Tuesday, February 23, 2010

RAVE: Competitive Sports!


In what context is it alright for a grown woman to sit on the couch in her apartment alone and shout angry things to a television broadcasting sports?

This may come as a surprise to you, but the woman is me. I'm sitting on my fine fuckin' coulo, screaming obscenities at hockey players. Quiet, subservient female? Yes, very.
My neighbours would like you to know that some recent calls by Ref Michelle include:

  • "Just shoot, fuckface!"
  • "Trip him with your stick!"
  • "Punch him in the eye!"
  • "Learn to skate, asshair!"
I'm so butch. Or I would be butch, if I were eating steak rather than romaine-and-avocado salad for dinner. I have to keep my trim figure if I'm gonna take home gold for ski ballet in 2014.

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Lady - I want to watch Hockey with you. I do the saammmee thing. Your neighbors would love both of us.

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